The world is drowning in information, yet starving for wisdom.
TLDR:
- Coaching is about empowering self-discovery, not giving solutions
- Master two approaches: horizontal coaching (skill development) and vertical coaching (mindset transformation)
- The most powerful coaching skill is asking transformative questions
- People don't have professional problems; they have personal problems reflecting in their profession
- How you do one thing is how you do everything
- Create a safe container for clients to explore and grow
- Focus on vertical coaching for lasting transformation
I invest more than $5,000 every year on my personal coaching because I know that without it, I'll end up collecting mental junk. With the right guidance, I can grow faster than I ever could alone.
The True Essence of Coaching
Your goal as a coach is to not to offer solutions but to show clients how to discover their own solutions.
Coaching differs fundamentally from consulting.
In consulting, you tell people exactly what to do: "Run Facebook ads" or "Create this funnel."
But coaching empowers people to tap into their own problem-solving abilities.
In the infinite possibilities of solutions to any problem, the best answer always emerges from within. As a coach, you must believe this deeply.
Two Powerful Coaching Modalities
Regardless of which methodology you use—whether NLP, psychotherapy, or another framework—understand these two fundamental approaches:
Horizontal Coaching: Developing Specific Skills
Horizontal coaching addresses skill gaps preventing forward movement.
If your client wants to excel at football, they need to master tackling the ball. You help them develop this specific skill to become a better player.
This approach optimizes for specific goals through targeted skill development.
Vertical Coaching: Transforming Inner Landscape
Vertical coaching dives beneath the surface.
When a client struggles in business, they rarely lack technical knowledge about Facebook ads or video creation. Instead, they battle with consistency and self-esteem.
In my experience, people don't have professional problems. They have personal problems that reflect in their profession.
Most people struggle with creating content online because they don't believe in themselves. The modern mind often thinks new equipment will solve everything. "If I buy a better camera, my YouTube videos will improve!" But the fundamental challenges are consistency, time management, and idea development.
Vertical coaching facilitates self-discovery. By transforming someone's perspective and behavior, you prepare them not just for one challenge, but for life itself.
The most valuable preparation isn't for a specific event—it's cultivating a mind capable of handling any future circumstance.
The Master Key: Asking Transformative Questions
The most powerful coaching skill is asking the right questions. Y
our effectiveness as a coach depends directly on this ability.
Weak Questions vs. Transformative Questions
A weak question like "Do you understand what I mean?" only allows yes/no answers. It creates no space for discovery or transformation.
Powerful questions open portals of self-awareness:
- "Why do you feel this way?"
- "Where else is this showing up in your life?"
I love asking "Where else does this show up?" because how you do one thing is how you do everything. A pattern in one area of life usually manifests elsewhere too.
By asking profound questions, you initiate self-discovery. As clients explore these questions, awareness blooms. You're not imposing your judgment—you're allowing universal wisdom to emerge through them.
Cultivating the Art of Powerful Questions
An ancient saying in Indian scriptures tells us: "Books only give you questions. The answers come from within."
To master transformative questioning:
- Question yourself differently. When facing challenges, approach them with investigative curiosity rather than victim mentality. This shifts from "What's happening to me?" to "What's happening here?"
- Embrace Brahma Jigyasa—the curiosity of the creator. With investigative intent, better answers naturally emerge from within.
- Study frameworks that expand your questioning repertoire. Your mind synthesizes information like a chemistry lab combines compounds into new forms. Feed it powerful inputs:
- Neurolinguistic programming
- Ancient wisdom traditions like Advaita Vedanta
- The Ashtavakra Gita
- "Heart of Awareness" by Thomas Byram
Creating a Container for Transformation
A powerful coaching practice requires a safe space for exploration. When clients feel secure, they can dive deeper into self-discovery.
Consider creating a dedicated community around your coaching practice. This container allows clients to develop in a supportive environment where vulnerability becomes strength.
The Vertical of Growth
When working with clients, prioritize vertical coaching alongside horizontal skill development. While technical skills matter, lasting transformation comes from deeper work.
Vertical coaching prepares the mind for any future challenge. It creates enduring change and, for professional coaches, delivers greater value that clients willingly invest in.
The Coaching Mindset
Resist the temptation to offer your opinions and solutions. Your best judgments, regardless of their merit, remain subjective opinions. They might perfectly solve your problems while missing the mark for others.
People are multidimensional, each with unique contexts and capabilities. True coaching honors the client's innate wisdom and helps them access it.
This doesn't mean technical advice has no place. Sometimes horizontal coaching provides necessary foundations. But always look for the vertical dimension in every client interaction.
The Self-Discovery
By changing someone's perspective and behavior through vertical coaching, you set them up for lifelong success rather than temporary improvement.
The journey of coaching is ultimately about self-discovery—both for the client and for you as the coach. As you guide others to ask better questions, you too evolve in your understanding of human potential.
The transformation you facilitate comes not from having all the answers, but from helping others discover their own inner wisdom through the power of the right questions.
Your coaching empowers people to find clarity amidst chaos, purpose amidst confusion, and strength within their perceived limitations. This is the true art of powerful coaching.
